In loving Memory of Hailey Elizabeth Leishman, Nov 20. 2009-Nov.26 2009

Last Friday, Our friends Aaron and Melica had a healthy, beautiful baby girl, named Hailey Elizabeth....yesterday she called me and told me that her precious angel passed away Thanksgiving Morning.

There are no words to describe my feelings....so many close friends....so many new angel babies......I am still in shock....and weary that yet, another friend has to experience the horrific pain of grief....for a lifetime... So sad that her children have to experience what my children have had to endure... This has been a painful year....

But then....so grateful to know that we are not alone in our grief. Our Savior is by our side and he sends angels to comfort us and give us strength. So grateful that I am a "year out" in my grief so I can offer solace to another bereaved mother...so grateful that my children will be able to offer love to their children in a way that only bereaved children can. So grateful that my husband will be able to reach out his arms of love for his friend...

So if you happen to read this post, Please send your love and prayers to the Leishman family. They will be holding a memorial service tomorrow, Sunday, Nov. 29th at 1:30 in Estero, Florida.

The hug

I have so many things to post. So much has transpired in such a short time...has it really been 6 weeks since I have last blogged? And two months since Evan's birthday, and 3 months since his one year in Heaven....so much to post...so much....

I have a beautifully sleeping baby....a little miracle....a ray of light...our "Sunshine baby"...it's funny how nick names develop.....I guess I better hurry and post before my newest angel awakens.

I will post on just one miracle today. Last Friday some friends of ours took us to Disney World (they have a family member that works at Disney) ....we got in for free! It was wonderful....so thrilled to have "fun again"... as a family...

I was sitting enjoying some musical performers, running to get fast passes and then nurse Savannah while the gang went on Pirates of the Carribean. Then a family walked by with a beautiful little boy with the blondest of hair and the twinkliest of eyes....waving at the performers...They stopped to watch the band, I just stared at this little boy. His face was shining, he was so happy. He was smiling at everyone....he looked and reminded me of Evan. Tears did stream down my face, not for saddness, well maybe a little, but thankful that I could have this moment of reflection. How I miss my sweet Evan. He would have loved this magical place.

That night I had a dream. I rarely dream of Evan, though I pray for that often. I saw Evan sitting in what looked like a store...I looked at him and he was smiling so big. I said, "Evan, there you are!" We both ran to each other and hugged. During the hug, I knew I was dreaming, but I didn't care. I hugged him so tight. I could feel his chubby little hands around my neck...it felt so real. When I awoke, I was not sad, though right now the tears stream down, I felt such warmth and happiness and excitement for someday I will see him and give him a "REAL" big hug.

Hugs are powerful.